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It’s been about a year and a half since General Hospital’s Eden McCoy (Josslyn) lost her mother, Natasha, to a long battle with cancer. It was a battle few knew about until she passed. And it was one McCoy kept to herself until then, as well.

And when the actress spoke with Maurice Benard for his State of Mind vlog, she opened up about how she made it through such a heavy loss — and how much it transformed her and her life.

McCoy shares that she doesn’t really have a relationship with her father, but, “My entire life was me, my mom and my dad. That was Christmas. We didn’t get together with other family. I don’t know any other family. So to lose that unit was devastating.”

But since her mother’s passing, she’s built a new family. Her chosen family. “My friends have become my family — literally.”

And that’s something that began from the moment her mom died.

“I remember it being really strange for a while,” McCoy recalls. ”Really numb. I had a few big breakdowns, but day to day, I was so OK. And not even in an ‘I’m shocked and my body is suppressing this grief’ way. I genuinely felt so grateful. My life was gratitude. I was so grateful for her, so grateful for the time. So grateful. It was crazy.”

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Part of that was the gratitude her mother taught her, even through her illness. As the actress puts it, while her mom was passing away, she “chose to feel lucky.” And then, “When she died, I was never alone for months. Literally never alone.”

Instead, McCoy just jumped straight into her community. “My friends became my everything,” she shares. “People were coming to my house, doing shifts just to sit. Just to be there. I remember not wanting to be alone. So that lasted for months, and it was just fun with friends time.”

It was, she said, “to be clear, extremely difficult, and still is. I was the best I’ve ever been with it in the months after she died. If we’re speaking on emotionally how distraught I was, the first few months, six months was the easiest for me. I was so close to it for so long. I get challenged when time gets longer since she’s died.”

And time is still teaching her things, as she faces new challenges and finds new revelations following her mom’s passing. “Something that I had to learn recently recently was there’s no solving or getting over anything,” McCoy admits. “It’s just acceptance, and it’s going to hit you when it hits you. And I’ve had to learn to honor that feeling.”

“My mom was the only person that would see me through anything,” she reflects. But even after such a devastating loss, they’re still together. “I come from my mom. I am my mom, physically. She made me. She is a part of my body, scientifically, and that gives me a lot of comfort. And also, I learn new things about her all the time because I’m a growing person.”

We can’t really imagine a better way to look at the loss of a parent. Or a more comforting one. It’s something we all, sadly, have to go through eventually. You can check out the full interview in the video above to hear McCoy talk more about her mom, her loss, how it’s changed the trajectory of her life and the incredible lessons she’s learned through it all.