We’ve said it before, we’ll say it again: The Young and the Restless needs some have-nots, and it needs them badly. Every character on the show is either a gazillionaire or so closely tied to one that they could get a conglomerate bankrolled as easily as we could borrow a fiver from a co-worker.

This is a problem on two levels. First, it brings the stakes down as low as the pavement. We don’t give a [bleep] who’s CEO of what because at the end of the day they’re all still richer than Croesus.  “Oh no, your mom fired you from your executive position? That’s going to change literally nothing about your life. You still won’t have to worry about buying groceries or paying the rent. Heck, you won’t even have to look at the Help Wanted ads because you’ve got as much moolah as Montgomery Burns!”

Just chillin’.

Credit: 20th Century Fox/Courtesy of the Everett Collection

Second, Young & Restless’ widespread affluenza leaves us with no one to whom we can relate. These people just bounce from one lofty position to the next without ever changing their business suits or enrolling in COBRA. They don’t even have to be qualified. “Hey, Diane, you’re an interior designer; wanna be CEO of a cosmetics company instead?” “Chance ol’ boy, never mind that you have always been in law enforcement, you can be vice-president in charge of something, too!” “Nate, my man, your career as a surgeon makes you the perfect candidate to swim with the corporate sharks.”

You could argue that, say, Tessa has a normal job like all of us do. But she and Mariah are close with Devon and Abby, so anytime the singer wants, she can just say, “How’s about you sign me to a lucrative record deal and send me on tour?” Most of us don’t have that option. Daniel and the late Heather fretted about their career prospects for a hot minute, but to what end? They never struggled to pay the bills at their amazing apartment and jetted back and forth to Portugal like tickets were the price of bus fare.